FIVE COOL WINTER WEEKS AND THREE HOTTER THAN HELL ONES IN AUSTRALIA

ROAD SIGN

No motorcycle adventure turns out as planned. The only

reason that we were even in Australia was because we had

decided to circle the world again on a motorcycle. We had

already done it east to west, so now it was south to north,

and we had just completed two trips to New Zealand.

Australia was next.

Disregarding the poor performance of our BMW's, a 1991 PD

and a 1991GS we purchase a 1992 GS in the states for $5500

and planned to ship it to Australia. Then after talking with two

other motorcyclists we found out what a horror it was to

ship a motorcycle from the US to Australia. And

Australia was one of the few countries that requires US

citizens to have a visa.

By good planning, we had no problem shipping our motorcycle.

Not only did the freight agent in Australia arrange for us

to pick up the motorcycle in  their storage building, but we

never ever even saw a customs agent. One has to have a

carnet or post a 30% value bond. It proved to be cheaper

to post a cash bond and our agent somehow convinced customs

that the motorcycle was valued, not at $5500 but at $1500

saving us tying up hard earned money until after we left

Australia.   We thought this was quite clever of him until we realize that

in Australia they know the true values of BMW's.

Because our main vacation time is in July, summer break for

school, that is when we planned to go to Australia. Of

course, it is winter down there but we don't like heat.

There are three bad aspects of traveling in Australia.

First, one can not travel from dust to dawn because of the

dangers of kangaroos. It is debatable if they are more

dangerous than deer but they are dangerous.   Just as one

see the carcass of dead deer along highways in the US after

they are hit by vehicles one sees dead kangaroos along the

roads in Australia. They are so bad that many vehicles

have special "roo" bars to protect the front and sides.

By traveling in Australia in the winter there is not more

than eight hours of sunlight.  We are use to traveling in

Nordic countries where there may be 20 hours of sunlight.

We like getting up early in the mornings, traveling

until noon, having breakfast, then traveling to 10:00 pm at

night. One can not do this in Australia in the winter and so the

motorcycle hours are limited.  Especially if there is ice

on the roads and one has to wait until it melts.

These long dark hours makes camping more difficult because

not only is it quite cool, but lying in a tent for l2 hours

a night is not invigorating. So camping was limited,

especially since one of us forgot to pack the camp stove and

other camping items. And one doesn't lie around the

beaches too much. In the winter these beaches are

basically deserted, especially, as our video showed, the

nude ones.  Although we did find some strange things

at the beaches.

Australia, in some respects, is quite like the US. It is

about the same size, the natives speak English, and one can

find gas, food, shelter, paved or non-paved roads of one's

choice, unlike Russia. But this is also a disadvantage.

While traveling we like to go off-road where there are no

other tourists, the natives don't speak English, and the

trip is some sort of a challenge. Very hard to do in

Australia. In fact, this is a disadvantage, as who wants

to travel to a foreign country to see a McDonalds, much

lees eat in a Kentucky Fried Chicken.    And there

is an H & R Block, and  20th Century Real Estate and

other forgettables just as as at home.

Of course. Australia does have problems with their

hamburgers. They may ask you if you want it with a

salad. This means on top, not on the side. And, they

always serve it with beets instead of pickles. Not being

beet lovers, we learned the hard way to ask for it "plain"

but when we did it proved to be better than US hamburgers

because it was real meat with no sawdust mixed in.

We don't like the traditional breakfast, but this is what is

served in Australia. Tourists are people who travel

thousands of miles to find food like they have at home.

We are no exception, and so often had hamburgers or steak

sandwiches for our noon breakfast.  At home, we

normally eat Chinese food at home and now that Australia

has changed their immigration policy, one can find more

oriental food as about 30% of the population is no longer

Northern European.    Most of the population is concentrated  in

the cities. In fact, 85% of Australia 20 million people

live in cities, mainly 5 large ones on the east coast.

While in Australia, we decided to see if the Australians were

the friendliest people in the world as we had been told.

We had been told in New Zealand by an American living

there that New Zealand people were quite friendly, but

didn't really like Americans. Then again, we didn't

like her either. Time would tell about the Australians.

We arrived on our flying cattle car in Melbourne at 3:00 am

and was at our freight forwarded at about 8:00 a.m. Within an

hour or so we had the motorcycle out of the crate and were on

the road.  We stopped and arranged to ship our motorcycle

to Tasmania on a drive on-drive off ferry in a week.

During this week we drove west from Melbourne along the

famous  Ocean road, taking  our time as it wasn't that far away,

less than 1000 miles.

                                           

Along the way, one day on a deserted rural road, it started

to rain a little and we saw a sign that said there was a

rest area ahead. So we decided to put our rain gear on and

so sped up, just a little, to get the gear on before we got

very wet. Then, behind us suddenly appear a cop car and

stopped us. We tried to explain the international law of

immunity, we being tourists, motorcyclists and one of us an

attorney by profession. Being a rural traffic officer, he

did not understand this concept. In fact, most of the

conversation centered around his amazement with Germans who

might be traveling 80 miles an hour and never looked back as

he would have to follow them for miles. We didn't have

the heart to explain to him that this was nothing for

Germans to drive fast on the autobahn, they might be going 160 mph.

We  knew that if he was every on the

autobahn he would wet his pants and we were afraid that he

would do so just by us telling him about it. And, since it was

still raining, we would never know. So much for

the theory that Australians are the friendliest people in the

world. In fact, this incident merely showed how much

Australians were like Americans since in the US traffic

officers are merely meter maids that have  had a sex change.

And seven thousand miles later they gave us, just like in

the states, another ticket. Both officers told us that

they didn't care if we paid the tickets and unlike in the US

they would not report the incident to our insurance company

to make life as misable as possible for us. We have only

gotten speeding tickets in two foreign countries, Soviet

Russia and Soviet Australia, if one doesn't count Canada and

Utah. In retrospect, we made have been somewhat unfair to this

Australian  traffic officers because when women meter maids

undergo a sex  change they need to add some parts and little did

we realize it but they  took the need parts from their brains

which they would no longer need as

traffic officers (which is why they could not

understand the international law of immunity) and put it

elsewhere. Or in

other words, as with all traffic officers, US or Australian , their

brains  are between their legs.

Australia in the winter is like Oregon. So the cool

weather and rain did not bother us.

Then it was to the ferry and Tasmania. Here there was

more ice on the roads but also often pleasant weather. But

one day it snowed on us, in fact, the weather here was worst

than that we found in Iceland.

One week and tourist

things  and back to the ferry to the mainland where we went up

the  east coast as far as time would allow.

The three of us,  which includes our motorcycle, voted on what

we did not want.

We did not want to motorcycle in

the heat nor cities. Our motorcycle voted against sand.

We named our motorcycle Ostrich. It is much like an

ostrich. An ostrich sticks its head in the sand when

frighten and our motorcycle often does the same, except

ass-backwards. It sticks its rear wheel in the sand and

that is the end of it.  We learned that when we did the

LA-Barstow-LV rally. We were not too  opposed to not

driving in the sand as sand usually means heat and due to a

back injury suffered in Iceland we did not want to engage in

attempting to pull it out of sand nor re-right it when it

falls over, which it frequently does.

After five weeks and about 6000 miles time ran out so we

left Ostrich with a friend in Townsville which is just

south  of Caines.  Donny was the proud owner of a new BMW      

1100GS. We told him that we would have our freight agent

contact  him about shipping the GS to Indonesia. We were next

off to climb Mt. Kilimanjaro in Africa that X-mas But it was not

too be.

Due to a confrontation with a carton of Pepsi, the back

injury  was re-garavated and so no mountain climbing for us.

The doctor said to bed for ten days and rest. But isn't

that the same as riding a motorcycle on paved roads.  So

5 months later we were back in Australia. Unfortunately

it was summer and hot as hell. We decided to go to Caines

which was even hotter. It was so hot that we could not

motorcycle between noon and four o'clock. We would get up

at 4 am., be on the road by five, motorcycle until 11

or l2 and then have breakfast and try to find a waterfall

to immerse ourselves.

Then at four we would be back on

the road and ride until dusk which was about 7 p.m., this

far north. We gave up the idea of heading further north

and decided to go south where it is cooler in the summer.

Further south we met a woman motorcyclist who said that once

she moved to Townsville and spent the entire time in the

shower drinking beer. Another motorcycle friend said

that just a few weeks before he had driven from Sydney to

Melbourne and found it very hot. On the way back he

decided to take the cooler coast road and when filling up

with gas would soak his head under tap water to cool off.

One time when he asked where the tap was and he turned to

go there he fell down from heat stroke.   He spent sometime in the hosiptal.  We were lucky

it did not happen to us.

One has to be very careful riding in Australia. For one

thing, when sober, they drive on the opposite side of the

road. Then there are the kangaroos and wombats and other

strange things. Kangaroos are bouncing little things and

often not little. Some are 7 feet tall and can weigh 200

pounds. The can leap 25 feet at 3 miles an hour, and are a

moving obstacle course.

Then there are those that live in

trees and can hop 50 feet down to the ground. We met a

GS rider who ran into one at night, causing  $3000 in damages,

and 90 days later BMW still had not obtain all the parts

necessary to repair his motorcycle. Another similarity

between Australia and the US.

Wombats are another hazard. They are dark pig like

animals that have very short legs and are about 3 feet

long. Hit one and that is it. We never did find anyone

that lived to tell about it but we saw dead ones (wombats

not motorcyclist) along the side of the road where they were

getting even bigger (and smeller). The local motorcyclists seem

to  fear Emus even more. During the day, emus would run

straight down the road towards you and be too stupid to turn

aside and run right into you because they didn't know the

difference between a GS and a bush that they could brush

aside. We saw all these animals but never had any close

encounters even when we misjudged and did not reach shelter

until after dust. No, no koalas even fell out of a

tree and hit us on the head but we did see dead ones on the

road and live ones in trees)

However, there are other strange animals that one has to be

careful of on the roads.

Everyone told us that Australia would be hot in the summer

and it was. To hot for us to go everywhere we wanted.

But no one told us that when we got as far south as Sydney

that there would be a freak hurricane. Now the rivers were

starting to flood. Often it would rain very heavily, so

heavy that we often couldn't see too well but the rain was

semi-warm,  not cold as in Oregon, so we didn't have to worry

about hypothermia. In the mountains, the unusual fog and

rain curtained some of our off-road riding and activities

but at least the days were longer as it would not get dark

until 8 to 9 o'clock.

As we headed south Ostrich began to run rough and early in

the mornings couldn't go over 60 miles an hour. When we got

to the Blue Mountains and the Snowy mountains which we had

missed before due to snow we found then covered in fog.  

Then the charging system  quit. Fortunately, we found a BMW

dealer and he had a

rebuilt alternator but not one other part we needed. But

we made it back down to Melbourne and then back up near

Brisbane where we left our motorcycle with Australia's

greatest mechanic, Paul, who is making several modifications

to our GS. Among other things he is installing dual

shocks and has developed a technique to fix the problem with

the drive shaft failing after 30000 miles because that is

what we now have on Ostrich. Hope it works because we are

hoping to  ship our GS to Indonesia and then to SE Asia and

the next mechanic is over  10000 miles away.

Wish us good luck.

For more information about this country go to the page for   AUSTRALIA

Or, return to  INTERNATIONAL MOTORCYCLE TRAVELLERS

Or, the        HOMEPAGE    FOR INTERNATIONAL MOTORCYCLE ADVENTURERS

                                                   @   http://www.rio.com/~tynda

 

4DEC 96.